Am I a Good Person?

Note to anyone who forwards emails to me…

Please do NOT send me “meaningful” messages with the following attached.

“We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people think twice about sharing. The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.

If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people on your address list that aren't the "appropriate" ones to receive this type of message. Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference. We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the "natural order of things." So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice: Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up that opportunity to brighten the day of those with us the least able, and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?”

I promise you… I will delete it.

I rarely forward “cute/meaningful/touching/amusing” emails to my friends or family… but I’ll tell you one thing, I will not be guilt-ed (sp) into sending crap like this out.

Isn’t it weird that the only people who really send me this stuff are people I work with? Is that really appropriate for the office? I know… stop laughing, nothing done in my office seems to be appropriate.

Anyone else agree?

Do you have crazy parents?

My Dad got his first tattoo over the weekend... actually he got two.

He got his first Harley in 2003, so of course he needed a Harley tattoo... being a big bad biker and all.

But before getting his Harley tattoo... he got one with heartfelt meaning.

My Dad now has a big red heart with a C and a J on each side (initials of my first name and my sister's) on his arm.

I've yet to see it... I think I'm still in shock.

What a great/crazy Dad I have.

I want...

THIS...

Wouldn't that be cool!?!

I Like to Describe Myself as “Colorful”...

I’ll admit that I over react on a regular basis, I tend to exaggerate and I take everything personally (even when it’s just business). It’s why I can tell great stories… and why I always have a story to tell. But if you’re having a bad day, I don’t feel the need to share why my day is crappier… I know it’s not all about me... well, not all the time.

I don’t think I live in crisis mode.

I’m generally happy; I’m laid back and enjoy going with the flow. I don’t like to be rushed (like when you’re getting ready to leave the house), but who does?

At times in my life I’ve found it difficult to avoid drama. I had friends who lived with lots of drama… luckily I’ve realized that their problems don’t have to be my problems and I don’t see or talk to those friends any longer.

We are given one of the greatest gifts… choice.

I have the choice of who I hang around with. I have the choice of what I do everyday. I have the choice to eat whatever I want, drink whatever I want and say whatever I feel. I am truly one lucky girl.

My office buddy has been living in crisis mode for the last 2 weeks (since returning from surgery that removed all her female "bits"). I work in a department that enforces rules… when people break those rules, we have to find out why things played out as they did and if possible fix the problem and educate those involved so that the issue doesn’t happen again.

The rules that are broken do not mean life or death. There will always be new instances where rules are broken… if there wasn’t… we wouldn’t have jobs. I want to tell her to shut up. Each person she talks to, she talks about “Pandora’s Box” opening in her lap and how stressed out she is. I have a little piece of advice for her… get a new job. I think we’d all be a little happier then.

Oh, and I don’t want to hear about your boyfriend anymore… or his twelfth wife or his sixteen kids (this makes him sound like white trash… have you not noticed this?), or your weight loss surgery (did it work any?), or your personal waxing habits (Ewwww...), or your adventures at Ray’s Play Pen… do you ever talk about appropriate workplace things?

I know this is all old news, but it doesn't seem to be easing up any. Anyway… I’m choosing to get over this… right now.

This weekend is going to fly by… tonight wedding rehearsal dinner (for an old friend of SHD… I have no idea who these people are), tomorrow wedding and reception, then working at the pet store and more painting…

Oh! The bedroom is done! Now to get started on the spare bedroom… then ALL OF THE PAINTING WILL BE DONE!!! Bwhahahah…. I wonder what the next project will be?

I'm Gonna Get All Wet...

I left the windows down on my car this morning...

I just heard that it's been raining ALL DAY.

I just want what is rightfully mine…

Last night some of the Waldo A$$holes met and went to the Royals game. They kicked the Orioles’ butts and that was fun… but I have a beef with the Royals.

My beef isn’t directly with the players, coaches or even the bat boy. My beef is with the fockers who said that the first 20,000 people get Monarchs t-shirts. I didn’t get a t-shirt last night… and there were only 18,500 in attendance. I was one of the 1,500 who got screwed.

I want my t-shirt dammit! The t-shirt is the reason I wanted to go to the game (besides getting to hang out with my friends... but I can do that and not have to pay $6 for a beer many other places)! I would have even paid for a t-shirt. They were cool! And I’m supposed to have one!

And just for the record… for those who will say, “well, you should have gotten there earlier”. Screw you! I did want to go get our tickets early! I wanted to get my t-shirt and go back to the car to tailgate some… but SHD said I had nothing to worry about… so in the end…

It’s SHD’s fault!

I’ve been one productive girl lately…

I’ve been painting our bedroom. Remember how the entire interior of our house was a dark turquoise? So when SHD and I talk about painting different rooms, it’s quite a task. It takes two thick coats of primer to hide the awful color that was and then it takes another two coats of paint to make everything nice.

So after you’ve slaved over four layers of paint… the taping and painting begins again… for the trim. They even painted the trim funny colors!!! The upstairs isn’t as bad as the first floor… at least they used gray on the trim in the bedrooms. White covers gray much nicer than navy blue.

So on Wednesday, I am a taping and painting fool once again. Trim won’t take as long, right?

Our bedroom really will be a beautiful room in the end. We’ve decided that the 2 ½ foot closets are not big enough for this girl, so we’re transforming one of the walls into a closet for us both to share. I’ll be making curtains to separate the stuff from the room… I’m looking forward to this. I’m thinking a dusty blue with iridescent tones… but not foofy. SHD has made it pretty clear that although he doesn’t expect a bachelor’s bedroom, ruffles and floral prints are not allowed. I’m positive I can do wonders with stripes!

Besides painting, I’ve been doing yard work, working at the pet store and trying not to kill myself while at the hospital. This week at the hospital hasn’t been too bad… I’ve stayed quite motivated and staying busy… busy will keep me sane here.

I went to the gym last night. The Couch-to-5K plan has begun again. I swear… I’m going to be able to run someday dammit! Is it weird that I’m starving the day after an intense workout? I’ve had oatmeal with a dollop of peanut butter and a banana today… and I’m still hungry. Hmmm… I’ll have to google that.

I’m excited to continue working out. I feel good today and I know that working out will release some of the everyday crap that we tend to let build up. I’m all about being healthier. At least that's the goal at hand... wish me luck!

Today I got a new stapler… this is my fourth in the last year.

I’m not hard on staplers, although I use them frequently. I’m kind to them, I don’t pound on them, I gingerly pick them up and squeeze.

I see many people pounding their fists on their little staplers and know why they don’t staple well. I mean, a stapler can only take so much pounding.

I’ve had a great old metal black Momma of a stapler, a nice plastic blue ergonomic hand held stapler, a free from vendor gift red see through plastic ergonomic hand held stapler, and now I’ve got a Swingline 405.

The Swingline 405 model is black, sleet with both plastic and metal fixtures.

The best part… it staples beautifully… flawlessly. There are no jams yet today, no wonky-flying-out-the-wrong-side instead of bending underneath and waiting to jab me in the finger, no you-think-I’m-going-in-but-I’m-really-just-jamming-up-in-there-real-good and it’s gonna take you forever to get me out. It’s doing its job… and that’s all I ask.

I love my new Swingline 405.

*I tried to get a nice pic of my new stapler... it's taking too long and I'm not that patient today.

On the other side?

I just had an interesting thing happen…

I saw two ladies struggling with a door as they were carrying a bunch of linen and supplies, so I held the door open for them both. They were joined by a man and the three of them started a conversation in Spanish.

I took four years of Spanish in high school and junior college… I won’t say that I remember a lot, but I do catch phrases and words in conversations.

They were making fun of someone… for not being able to speak Spanish.

Yes, people who don’t speak Spanish usually know what “no habla Espanol” means. Some people also know what “como se dice” means as well. They were making fun of someone who was asking them how to say different words in Spanish.

I judge and make fun of others on a daily basis. I make fun of people for various reasons: bad hair days, poor wardrobe choices, camel toes… I could go on and on.

I will say however, I have never, NEVER had a lively conversation with friends making fun of people for not speaking my language in front of someone who doesn’t speak that language. And, they did this just after I was polite and courteous to them.

I just think it was rude.

To leave things on a positive note (because that’s the direction I’m trying to go now…)…

The artwork for my new tattoo has begun. I expect to see something in the first week or so of August. My appointment is Aug. 23rd at 11am. This will be my first substantial tattoo… I’m super excited!

Come On Already, Mr. Summer!

I think I have PMDD.

I left my Midol at home today and I think I’m going to kill someone. I don’t know if it has to do with the heat, but I am SO bloated that I feel like a great blue whale (although I am wearing green today) and I’m really tired, much more tired than normal and irritable as hell.

I’ve been trying to eat better/less over the last few days. I’m not really calling it a diet; I’m just trying to watch what I eat more closely. I figure if when I quit smoking (seven years ago this January) I never said I was quitting really, I just said I wasn’t going to smoke that day… and that worked… so maybe I can lose some weight by not calling what I’m doing a diet? Who knows.

I did have another interesting dinner last night… a bowl of lightly salted/peppered cottage cheese, pickles (no, I’m not expecting) and a beer. Just when you were thinking beer couldn't taste any better... I've discovered that eating pickles with your beer actually brings out the flavor of the beer and makes it taste better. Yeah, I was shocked too. My beer really tasted good last night... and I only had one.

The bedroom is all trimmed out and waiting for the first layer of rolled primer. I was worried about sleeping in the room with all of the paint fumes, but I think I stayed up late enough (also contributing to being a bit tired today) that most of the smell had blown out of the room, thanks to our new chilly window air conditioning unit.

I'm on a quest... a quest to be a better NutScraps. I'm doing this for me and only me. I’m trying to be a more positive person. Really. There are plenty of things I could have put in this post… but I deleted, to aid me in my quest to become more positive. I’m a little judgmental and don’t give people the slack they *might really* deserve sometimes.

I really don’t hate everyone, at least I don’t want to hate everyone… and I don’t hate kids, I really don’t want anyone to think I hate kids either. Kids like me... that's why I always end up hanging out with them at get togethers. Kids are fine... as long as they aren't coming home with me.

So, look forward to hearing from positive NutScraps… not just irritable, gripin’ all the time NutScraps.

OH! I'm knitting tomorrow night with the Knit-and-Get-Lit girls! I haven't been able to go in quite sometime... I'm really excited to see how everyone's summers are going.

Kinky? Not Really...

Last night I ate pickles for dinner... it's all I really wanted. I was busy, I was clearing out the bedroom for tonight's festivities.

Tonight...

I paint the bedroom.

Warning... Lunchers Beware!

Today, I walked down to Crown Center for lunch. I had a hankering for the wonderfully refreshing green tea at Panera.

The Panera was packed with snooty Crown Center shoppers (do these people work?)... I didn't have enough time to wait, so I walked across the street to Einstein Bros.


<--- This is the Italian Chicken Panini.

DON'T EAT IT.

I'm now trying to get the taste out of my mouth.

I should have just had a cookie... Ohhh... cookie, that sounds like a good idea.

Reason # 1,432,578...

... why I don't have children.


Price of a Leather Sofa $1,000
Price of Flat Screen TV $1,500
Price of Wood Flooring $1,200
Look on Mom's face....PRICELESS















OMG... I would no longer have children.

Don't look for me using this...

I just found out that someone found my blog while search for "womens bathroom/poop stories".

Sick fockers... need not apply. One word covers this... EWWWW!

I Don't Hate Everyone... Really!

It is amazing to me how mean spirited, two-faced and spiteful women can be.

Ask SHD and he’ll tell you that I don’t like 80% of people that I meet/see. I won’t say he’s completely accurate, but I do find myself being sour with LOTS of people, the number gets even larger if we’re talking strangers.

I think my poor attitude stems from my days waiting tables and working for a cell phone retailer. When you are required to work with the public, you begin to lose the rosy image of mankind. Believe me; I’m doing better these days. Even five years ago I wasn’t able to go Christmas shopping in the hustle and bustle because I wanted to kill all those around me (I almost got into a fight at a Wal-Mart once), thus began my internet shopping habits.

I work in a department with nine other women. I think I want to work with all men in my next job. We all used to get along. We would go out to lunch together, we would have little food days to celebrate different things, but all has changed now. There was an issue regarding the Board of Directors for our organization and someone not doing their job. Our boss made a decision, the correct decision for the situation, and half of the gals have turn against her. It’s just incredible. You would not believe the lengths these two gals are going to splash my boss’s name in the mud.

I just walked up on a conversation in the hall they apparently didn’t want me to hear. They turn, plaster their faces with the fakest plastic smiles possible and say, “Hiiii, how are you today?” and wait to begin speaking again until I’m out of earshot.

I don’t like you, you evil women. You know how I don’t look up from my computer when you walk in and try to spread your negativity? You know how I’m short, yet sweet, on the phone and don’t indulge in the latest gossip? That’s because I don’t care to listen to you and your bullshit any longer. Make someone else listen. I’m done.

I’m sure everyone out there has toxic people around them… I feel your pain.

That being said, I’m having a pretty good day.

Honkey... I love them.

Honkey ROCKED last night… I’m SO glad SHD and I decided to go! Good music, good beer, lots of friends… I believe it's just what a girl needs.

No word from the prospective job offer-ers yet. I’m trying not to think about it, I mean, I don’t have good feelings about it, so why dwell right? Well, I’m trying not to think about it.

I’ve got to say though, the “ergo eval” that I had a few weeks ago wasn’t worth shit. I can’t believe that I have excruciating back pain - only while sitting at my desk. After an hour or so of sitting at my desk it's difficult to stand… just walking to the bathroom is about all I can take. That’s the thing though, my back hurts, so I get up, it hurts worse, then after walking around for a little while it actually starts feeling better. Then of course, I have to go sit down again and the vicious cycle starts over. I’m not sure what to do… I’m working really hard on good posture… you don’t get bad posture overnight… I’ve been practicing that for 27 years.

A co-worker of mine sent this picture out today…

WTF??? Do kids really do this kind of shit? I mean, I find it really hard to believe that this little booger covered his "lil' sausage link" so carefully and all the others are completely random. I wonder if it was the picture taker's afterthought... was there an afterthought? Wha?

Poor kid, his Mom (or whoever) took the picture, sent it to some of her friends, and now the little critter is being shown to office all over the world.

What's he got behind his back? He's SO busted... there's almost thing to hide now.

What a difference a day makes…

I’ve been a little off lately, I think today is the first day in a little while that I’m starting to feel like myself again.

My interview went well yesterday… not sure if I’ll get an offer though. I really think I hit it off with the boss man, but I just have a feeling… I’m not sure he’ll call back. I’ve done all I can… I’ll just keep looking, returning calls and forge ahead.

I’m trying to deal with a toxic co-worker. We used to get along pretty well… she’s just crazy now. I think she’s going through menopause (well at least that’s all she talks about anymore)… she’s completely exhausting to talk to. She NEVER has anything nice to say about anyone or anything and she “schools” me hourly on things she knows better than I do. “Hello! Lady you’re like 40 years older than me… of course you’re going to remember the Reagan election more clearly than me, I was 5!” Sheesh! I’m just going to let her calls go into my voicemail… she doesn’t need anything work related anyway.

Avoidance... the name of my game.

I’m excited about the Honkey and Crazy Talk show tonight at Mike’s Tavern. It seems like it’s been forever since we’ve been out. I hope all the Waldo A$$holes will be there.

Maybe it's the rain?

I have an "ability"... to turn things off, put on a happy face and keep going. I'll admit it's probably a coping mechanism. I wish I could turn it off. I'm tired of being everything-is-great-nothing-is-wrong Jen.

Yeah, I'm kicking this day off great... and I have an interview this afternoon... I'm sure I'll perform nicely. Which is exactly my point.

Ugh...

Update! Update!

I have a second interview scheduled!!! After taking some nerve wracking little mind bending tests this morning (before my coffee, I might add) I talked with the gal who used to hold the position I’m going for, for almost an hour.

Yeah, she loved me… and I think she’s a smart gal for it! I’m going in on Monday afternoon to meet with the boss man… if he’s smart… he’ll love me too! (but not in a bad way)

I’m pretty excited about this… the position has been open since April, I guess they’re looking for just the right person. I believe I’m that right person.

Ummm… choo choo sushi… just down the road!

I've got an interview!!!

I took today off of work... because I... wasn't in the mood.

I slept horribly - probably because my day was just sooo off yesterday.

I am feeling better, but still not in the mood.

I returned a few calls from prospective employers, as I have NO privacy to make these types of calls where I work. And I have an interview for tomorrow morning.

Let me know if you know anything bad about the 84th & Neiman area.

Wish me luck!

Approach at Your Own Risk... She Might Bite!

Today feels like the crappiest Monday ever… thank goodness it’s Wednesday, I couldn't take a full week of this.

We had such a good time celebrating the 4th of July yesterday with SHD's family. I can’t imagine why I’m so unbelievably grumpy today.

I’ve avoided answering my phone (at work) because I’m just not into being Miss Social today.

I just want to growl at somebody (literally, I want to growl at somebody/anybody, I’m not being picky today with my grumpiness).




Grrr… This is how I feel right now.



Tomorrow will be better, right?!?

The Celebration Begins Early…

Last night SHD and I went to TVH and V’s new place to do a little pre July 4th celebrating. S brought a small arsenal; Toast gave me the cutest turtle firecracker ever! Unfortunately I did not get to set off the little guy… someone stole him from my hiding place. All is good (last night in my drunken stupor I was ready to tear the arms off the little bastards who stole him), I’m sure they enjoyed themselves.

I’m an emotional person. I love and hate with all that I have. I take things personally… even when they aren’t. I’m crazy like that. Not much to this… I’m just saying is all.

I talked with a few people whom I haven’t had the chance to get to know yet, which was pretty cool. And I’m wishing more now than ever that I could access CCM from work. I would get to know everyone all that much better if I had the constant interaction that others have.

I’m at work today… I believe SHD’s still sleeping soundly. Someday when he gets to retire before me it’s going to really suck. When I see him, all snuggled up… it’s almost impossible for me to leave, I just want to crawl back in bed with him. I’m sure I’m not the only one experiencing this. Did I mention that he has the whole week off? Ugh… this week’s going to be tough.

I’m still folding letters for this horrendous mass mailer. I wish we would have prepared a little better for this. Once I’m finished folding the 750 letters to be folded and inserted into envelopes, I have to SEAL them all. I ordered one of those roller things which keep you from having to lick the envelopes, but it hasn’t arrived yet. I’ll have to come up with something. I’m not going to risk glue poisoning. It could happen.

I really need to lay off on the drinking on school nights… Goodness! I need a nap.

I had a super-fantastic night though, so hat’s off to TVH and V for their great pre July 4th party.