It's a good thing...

I'm seeing my therapist tomorrow...

OK... I'm not going to give her my letter...

I have to realize that I'm not the only person living in my house... and I cannot speak for everyone.

I need to go over and have a conversation with Little Girl's Mom... I don't want to (I HATE confrontation), but I'm going to.

Little Girl will be allowed in my yard... just as long as I'm there to supervise.

Fuck... I hate children.

And the letter will be delivered tonight...

*Little Girl's Mom,

First, I would like to thank *Little Girl (LG for short) for drawing me the nice picture and for the flowers she picked for me when I was feeling ill last Tuesday. I really like LG and have enjoyed getting to know her. It think it was a very nice and thoughtful thing for her to do.

Unfortunately something happened before that, that I think you should be aware of.

LG came over to our house and asked to play with Lucy and Sammy; she stayed for about a half an hour. From inside the house, I saw her throwing sticks and rocks from our yard at our other neighbor’s dogs. I was about to go outside and ask her to stop but she stopped on her own. I don’t think it is ever a good idea to throw things at a dog.

A few minutes after witnessing this, I walked past the front windows to see LG, with both hands on Lucy’s collar, trying to pull Lucy across the front yard. Lucy did not want to go wherever it was that LG was heading and was making it a struggle. The next thing I saw was very disturbing to me. With one hand holding Lucy’s collar, LG hit Lucy in the face, twice. I was shocked. I immediately went outside and told LG that she was never to hit Lucy again and then I brought the dogs inside.

I wished I would have come over and talked to you right then, but I was very ill and just wanted my dogs out of a physically abusive situation. I am very disappointed in LG; I trusted her to behave appropriately with my dogs without my supervision. We never physically correct our dog’s behavior and from my point of view, the only thing Lucy did ‘wrong’ was not follow LG's demands.

I’m sorry to say that LG is not allowed to come into our yard to play with our dogs again.

My dogs are like my children and it is my responsibility to protect them. I’m positive this situation would not have occurred if I had been in the yard, which saddens me.

I am not coming to you to get LG in trouble, but for the safety and well being of all involved. I believe that treating animals kindly and with respect is a valuable lesson learned.

Please feel free to call me if you wish to discuss this further. I can be reach on my cell phone at anytime, 816-***-****.

Sincerely Yours,
NutScraps

After talking with my gal pal St., and not seeing Little Girl's Mom without company, I decided to write her a letter. This is a plus, because not only will I be purchasing a no trespassing sign for our gate, I have a document that proves they were told that LG shoudln't be on our property.

Let me know what you think!

Impossible to be unhappy pics...

Puppies... and other cute things... make everything better.

Now I go get a cut and color ... another thing that makes everything better, a new hair do!

The redundancy is getting old...

I am a nice person.

I don’t know why I have to keep repeating my self this simple fact.

Why? OK, I’ll analyze this.

I don’t know why it is that some people feel the need to talk down to you… because they are a) having a bad day; b) unhappy with their job; c) so unbelievably nasty and bitchy in their own lives that they want to take everybody else down with them.

I work with a woman who is psychotic. And I’m seriously about to lose my temper.

I’m a pretty intelligent person. I am an assistant. I guess I need to define what an assistant does and does not do…

I will make this a shortened/condensed version.

An assistant will DO the following:
Make copies
Answer phones
Compose drafts of letters, emails and memos
Schedule meetings and maintain calendars

An assistant will NOT DO the following:
Pretend to read your mind
Take the heat when you don’t do your job
Take your crap when things aren’t done because you don’t do your job
Allow you to:
Talk down to me
Belittle me
Act condescendingly towards me
Be flippant without the expectation for retaliation

I am a professional. I do not need someone to hold my hand. I expect to be treated with the same amount of professionalism that I give. Just let me do my job.

You don’t get respect until you give it, you crazy psycho bitch. I hate you.

Again, I am a nice person… I’m going to go cry now.

I need a little help...

First I want to thank you guys for your comments regarding the "incident" last week. I am feeling much calmer regarding the subject and have taken your comments to heart. I won't be the mean lady who yells at little kids and never talks to them again...

Second... I need some advice.

In about two weeks, SHD and I will be celebrating one year of togetherness... I'm really excited.

At the same time, I'm terrified because I don't know what to get him. What do you get for a man who gets what he wants himself? I've been think of this for a few weeks... and I need help.

Plus, it's been YEARS since I've celebrated a one year anniversary... I don't even remember what kind of gift is appropriate.

Let me know if you have any ideas.

Back to Rational Scraps...

So, I’ve had time to think rationally about what happened in my yard on Tuesday.

I’m pretty damn lucky Lucy didn’t bite that little girl.

I’ll admit that I’m having concerns for the little girl who beats up on animals when she thinks no one is watching.

I’m thinking of having a conversation with the girl’s Mom. Not to tell her that I think her daughter is going to grow up to be a serial murderer… but to let her know why I think it’s a bad idea for her daughter to play with Lucy now.

Lucy is a shy Golden Retriever. I’m not sure if my ex did something to her… she’s very nervous around new people… especially men. I am lead to assume that a man in her life at some point did something to make her leery. She went a little bonkers (with scary teeth and snarly noises) on me once and once on SHD… she doesn’t do well in situations when she feels cornered… but who does (said a little in her defense)?

It is never good to growl and bite at someone… but in the end… she’s an animal… that will protect herself if she feels threatened. That fact cannot be changed.

My job as a responsible pet owner is to keep my pets safe and those around them safe. If that means that the next door neighbor needs to find another way to entertain her daughter… I guess that’s her issue.

* Thanks for the comment, Annon... I appreciate a parent's point of view.

Oh! I saw this while surfing today... I think it's kinda cool... in a rave'y' sort of way (I'm not really a rave attending kind of gal... but I still think it's cool).

Taking Tme to Smell the Roses... or Something...

What is it with smelly things?

I am usually very alert of scents. I hate mint. Pepermint makes me queasy, seriously. It’s not that I just don’t like the smell… I have a reaction to it… it makes me sweat, I start to burp (twice if I’m actually going to vomit) and then the big heave-ho. Usually the scent isn’t too strong (I can open a window or something), so I haven’t suffered the embarrassment due to Altoids… yet... but I have been very close.

I also am one of those people who at just the hint of someone else’s vomit, blow chunks too. Combine the hint of smell with the sound of someone hurling (I hate dry heaving noises) and it’s all over… twice the damage… guaranteed.

I guess it’s best I decided not to become a nurse (or a Mom).

So my two examples above indicate that good (to some) or bad (to most) smells effect me.

I want to know why my dog, Lucy, likes to roll around in the most horrible, gag reflexing smells she can find. I used to think it was poo… but this morning there was no poo residue on her neck… it was wet, and it smell gawd awful. Doesn't it make her want to gag? It's like she's proud when she trots into the house!

I used three doggie wipes (the bath kind, originally bought for this purpose) and I think I got her pretty good… but whatever she is rolling in smells… B..A..D..!!! Those doggie wipes are good, but don’t get it all. Guess it’s time to make an appointment for Lucy’s next day of beauty (did I mention that Lucy got haircut #2 for the summer, done by me, and she looks great? She looks just like Nala (if I have to explain who that is, you just won't get it)).

I wonder if she did this because of the abusive next door neighbor??? Trying to take some of the control back in her yard???


(yeah, probably not… but I thought it was funny)

99% of the time I'm really nice...

Often I make fun of people… it’s sad, I know… but I can’t help myself sometimes, OK a lot of times, OK I can’t control myself at all… OK, OK, I make fun of people all the time.

If I have ever made fun of anyone for not handling pain well, specifically back pain… I am truly sorry.

Back pain is nothing to be taken lightly or to laugh at… I now know this… seriously, as I am in pain, big-fat-real-hard-to-deal-with, pain. There is no relief, no position to sit/stand/lie in to ease the pain. Hell, the narcotics I’m taking are completely worthless, I might as well be taking tic tacs… then I wouldn’t be building a tolerance to aforementioned useless prescriptions.

And when you ignore your dogs (well, specifically a little black and white one who wants to go outside) and you don't really realize it because you’re passed out on the couch in a muscle relaxer coma… they hike their leg and pee all over the floor. Rage… rage makes the pain subside just long enough to kick the pee-er out the door, but then it (the pain) returns.

Side note: the dogs had been let out of the house 3 hours before the peeing incident occurred… he can hold it longer than 3 hours dammit.

I think I’ve uncovered something… Rage works… like when I looked out the window and saw the little neighbor shit (aka. 7 year old neighbor girl) pulling/trying to drag Lucy by the collar, then hit in the face TWICE… because apparently Lucy wasn’t doing exactly what she wanted.

Wait! That little shit just hit my dog!!! In the face!!!

I immediately went outside and told the little shit, “NEVER hit Lucy EVER again… it’s time for you to go home” and I let the dogs into the house. Apparently she felt bad enough to leave some lilies she picked on our porch with a picture she drew for me, saying that she hopes I feel better soon. That made me feel a little guilty… I mean, who wants to be the nasty lady next door? But I swear… if she hits one of my dogs again…

Lucy’s not used to being treated that way… What if Lucy had bit her? I’m sure it would be deemed the dog’s fault (I can just hear the headlines now... "Golden Retriever Goes Wild on Small Child"). I mean, if I were put in that situation (as the dog)… I’d be like, “Whoa bitch, you’re in my yard… we play by my rules… I’m gonna bite you in the ass”!

I won’t have her in my yard alone with either of our dogs again… hell, she’s never welcome back as far as I’m concerned… You must remember, I don’t want kids, I don’t really like them either… especially the 7 year old kind.

NO ONE has the right to come into your yard and knock around your dogs… right?

Not just casual Fridays...

...which I don't get either.

Does anyone get paid to go to college? I'm not meaning, schooling to get a good job and get paid kind of thing... but actually get paid to go to class? Oh, and... get paid good money?

I need to figure out what kind of job I should get to be able to dress in jeans, t-shirts and the shoes of my choosing… every day.

I drive through the UMKC campus on my morning drive to work. School is back in session and there were hordes of college students walking to class. There were all sorts of them… some dressed in the newest, cutest, trendiest skirts and heels (which I think is silly - walking around campus in such unreasonable shoes... ) and some in sweat pants and tennis shoes. I was jealous of the girls in jeans and t-shirts.

Who says that dress clothes make you more professional? I guarantee that I am more productive when I am comfortable and think I look good. Most times I don’t think I look good in the “dress” clothes I have to wear to work… I agonize at the closet every morning and usually hate what I decide on. I think it would be good for my mental health to skip this morning ritual. I have those few staples that I end up buying one in every color… but even that gets old.

I want to wear jeans, t-shirts and flip flops or tennis shoes… whatever I feel fits my mood best… each day. Don’t get me wrong, I want a job, one that challenges me… I’m not asking to sit at home everyday.

I just wanna wear jeans. I don’t think that’s asking too much.

In other news… I’ve let go of something I held onto a little too long. No, I'm not going to go into detail... I didn’t even realize it. I’m not bitter any more. And it makes me feel good.

She’s just like a squirrel…

I’ve talked about her many times… the uncomfortable conversations about adultery (hers not mine), waxing practices and intestinal issues…

If it’s not the whispering across the hall… it’s the MUNCHING noises from across this very small room they call my ‘office’. She eats all the time.

munching… whispers… munching… whispers… munching… whispers…munching

Maybe SHD and I shouldn’t have finished both of the celebratory bottles of champagne last night… all my car business made me skip dinner.

Ok... So I'm Not Really Naming It...

But... here she is.

I'll Call Her Eleanor... Ellie for Short

I'm car shopping... kinda freaked out by the whole ordeal... kinda invigorated that I'm doing something pretty big, by myself, for the first time.

I found a 2003 Honda Element, black with tinted windows, CD/MP3, keyless entry, 28k miles, lots of fixin's... all for only $13,998. I thought I had found the perfect vehicle.

The catch you ask?

Besides being located in Chicago (they's ship it here formereear $150), there's no factory installed air conditioner. WTF? Who makes a car that doesn't come with air conditioning? I'm only getting a new car because my car's air went out and then started going to shit, so no air is definitely a stopping point... Next Please!

BUT... the good thing this car gave me... it gave me a bargaining tool. Online there is a car with low mileage, 'cool' features (pun intended) and pretty low cost. So I've been calling the few car dealers here in town asking if they can beat this deal I have set up in Chicago.

Two of the three I've called have told me they will beat my deal. YESSS! One point for me. I'm a negotiating fool!

Now, the hard part will be - knowing when to walk away. I know that I don't have to buy these cars. If they don't give me the deal they have worked out over the phone... I'm going to the next dealership.

I'm going to have a late evening tonight.

If I bring an Element home soon... I think I'll call her Eleanor... Ellie for short.

Wish me luck!

Major Grindeage…

More car drama… if there are any really super nice and honest mechanics out there that would like to help a gal out… let me know!!!

Grinding… major grinding… when I start my car.

Now it’s the bearings going out of: A) the compressor or B) the water pump (please don’t let it be the water pump).

I hear that the dealership will take my trade-in based on year and mileage… they won’t worry too much about the other stuff… I think I need to take it in before things get any worse. Does this sound right? I need advice.

I may be buying a car tomorrow night… normally this would be a really cool and good thing. But I wish I’d brought my Zanax to work today… my anxiety right now is through the roof… I just need to breath deeply and let it go.

What a great weekend!

I’m sad to be back at work… but that’s life, right?

Friday night SHD and I had dinner with new friends we met at the wedding the boyfriend was in a few weeks ago. We went to Genghis Khan and drank some beer.

Genghis Khan was pretty good. I love Mongolian BBQ so I was excited to go. They have fantastic tofu there. I wish they would have had teriyaki sauce; I’m not one to experiment much when it comes to my food, so I like to stick with basics. I used soy sauce and sugar water… there wasn’t enough sweet… so it was kind of like eating a saltlick. But the tofu was fantastic, fried perfectly, nice and squishy… not mushy. They need to stop offering the white pepper. Every time someone would use the white pepper, the entire restaurant (it seemed) would either start coughing or sneezing. I was doing both. I’m not sure it was the white pepper, but every so often, I would get choked up and not be able to keep talking. The beer was cold and the company was great… I’d go again, but I want to sit by the door and be a little more open to different sauce variations.

Saturday was spent shopping. Shopping for a bedspread, side tables, lamps and fabric for curtains for the bedroom. Since our bedroom is the attic of the house, there are eaves on both the south and north walls. Also, since the closets are practically non-existant we’ve decided to convert the south wall into a closet that spans the length of the room. You can’t really have doors on this setup, so I’m making curtains. They are going to be fantastic. I’ll post some pics once we are finished… I’m working on curtains tonight. I’m excited.

I LOVE doing crafty things! And I'm glad that we were able to agree on colors for everything... it was great. We had lots of fun hanging out.

Sunday evening was spent bowling with some of the Waldo A-Holes. I played MUCH better than I remember playing in recent years... Game #1-134... I slipped on game #2-84... Game # 3-139. I actually beat SHD on game #3... and some say he's a very good bowler. I just love Waldo...

I’m agonizing over this whole car thing… I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to pay to fix the a/c… there’s a new grinding sound which can’t be good… and I'm not looking forward to the scheduled maintenance at 100,000 miles... but I don’t want to buy a car with a big car payment either. I don’t think I want another used Civic. I love my car, but if I get a different car, I want a different car, you know?

I don’t know what kind I want either… I’d like to get an Element like SHD and St… I love the Elements… I just don’t know if I can find one cheap enough.

I hate making decisions like this. Ugh.

I got The Essential, 2 disc Johnny Cash set this weekend... I've not been listening to anything else since. If I had a son... I'd name him Sally too...

Not Really Into It Today...

I'm not much into talking... I gave blood this morning and have been a little puny since.

I wish...

I wish I was with my puppy... right now...

This is Lucy... when she was a baby.

This is Lucy fall 2004 on her first trip to the Shawnee Mission dog park. Don't tell her I told you - she was hiding in the trees because she was scared of the water.

She's such a smiley girl...

I need to post some picks of both her and Sammy... I'm so bad at downloading pics from my computer.

Here's just a few more puppy pics that make me happy.

Today Has the Beginnings of a Super Great Day...

I got out of bed after only pushing snooze… once.
I went to the gym and exercised my butt off (hopefully to be a littler butt soon).
I didn’t break a sweat on the drive into work (see air conditioning drama).
I got to work early.
I didn’t fight with one of my co-workers (crazy menopausal bitch) first thing in the morning (she loves to ruin my mornings… first thing even!).
I’ve signed up to donate blood tomorrow mid-morning… they are out of my kind and need it.
I’m listening to my favorite movie soundtrack (Garden State) off of my iPod.

I’m going someplace good for lunch today… not sure where yet…
It’s PAYDAY!!!

AND… I’m going to knitting tonight!

Day’s Doin’s: 25 minutes on the elliptical… burned 266 calories (according to the machine)

Linksville... in the Afternoon

I just fell in love with a new-found website.

I’m a crafter… actually I’d love to have more time to be a crafter (anyone else agree?). SHD is finding out just how much crafting supplies I’ve hidden (not really hidden, just not displayed in one place) now that we’re cleaning out the second bedroom.

I knit, I crochet, and I sewed some curtains for a bookshelf in the dining room. I don’t get to knit enough, although I’ve vowed to start going to the knitting group functions again as often as physically possible… it’s ME time, right?

Now I want to quilt. I want to make fabulous quilts like http://weewonderfuls.typepad.com/. She’s so talented at putting the different patterns/coordinating colors together… she’s a gem.

And I’ve found the perfect online fabric store – reprodepot.com. I think I’ll ask for fabric for Christmas this year. I’m so bad coming up with good ideas for gifts (I am part of a family that asks for lists… so hard!). This way, I’ll get the tools (or fabric) to make my magnificent quilt… and only need to find the time to actually do it.

I’d LOVE to make a quilt for our bed. Right now we have an incredible quilt SHD’s Grandmother made… it’s wearing out and we don’t want to see it destroyed. Now, if only getting the boyfriend to help me choose fabric… I’m still thinking in blues.

I'm Gonna Be a Gym Rat...

I got up early today and started my day off right with a trip to the gym. I’ve mentioned my Couch to 5K running program before… I’m trying to finally get on the bandwagon and actually DO it. This morning I did a run/walk for 30 minutes. I’m doing 1 ½ minute intervals (1 ½ minutes of jogging and then 1 ½ minutes of walking after a 5 minute warm up brisk walk) and I’m feeling pretty good today. It's harder than you think... I'm not a runner and I never have been. I faked asthma in Jr. High so I wouldn't have to run the mile... I think we were only required to do it once... and I didn't. My feet are a little tender, but SHD says that is to be expected. He doesn’t think I can do this… I’m going to prove him wrong (I think he has that silly guy mentality, if I tell her she can't she will... it just doesn't work that way).

I have to make exercising a priority… no else will. It’s so hard to go to the gym after work… and you have to go right after work because you can’t eat dinner then expect to go running right? So I have to start getting up earlier… I can do it.

So, I’ll try to keep a running (pun intended) log of what exercise I’ve done for the day at the bottom of my posts… get on me if you see me slackin’!

Day's Doin's: 30 minutes, 5 min. warm up, 1 1/2 minute run/walk intervals

Moment to Moment Update...

So, I think I'll just not get the air conditioning fixed... for now.

I don't have $1000 for the air conditioning and I'm even thinking that the new tattoo are going to have to wait.

I think I want a Yaris. New cars don't have problems right? And if they do, they're covered under a warranty.
I might be car shopping in a few days... or wait until winter when no one will know that the air conditioner is broken (sorry Toasty).

Air Conditioning Drama...

So on the way out to the Demolitian Derby on Saturday night... the air conditioning in my car went out.

This makes me sad.

I've called two places now... it's going to cost me $1000 to get it fixed.

This makes me want to cray... as I don't have $1000.

Be prepared to see a very irritable NutScraps... and a very warm one.

I'm Home Base...

You remember when you were a kid and playing with friends in the neighborhood and there was always that one person in Tag who was "home base" and they were "safe"? That person when you were touching them no one could tag you IT?

I'm Home Base... in my office.

I'm the place where people come to gossip about everyone else, and while there, they ask me what is going on with everyone else.

I'm in an interesting position... I have the upper hand.

I play dumb, "gee, I didn't know that was going on" and get to see their reaction... then they tell me thier version. I love to see the different sides of drama.

The trick is that I'm good at not mentioning the snich in conversations with the subject of the latest "rift" and hear the story again from their point of view.

Things have quieted down a lot in the last month... the drama is settling but now that my boss is out of town this week... the trolls are coming for information.

I'm getting really good at this clueless look. I am enjoying them scramble for information like little mice for a cookie. Isn't it weird how we all think that everyone needs to like us? I think that's what it all boils down too.

Just remember... if someone will gossip to you about someone else, what makes you so special that they won't gossip about you to someone else.

I wonder what they're saying about me...

Fashion Faux Paus???

I'm not a fashion diva... surprise, surprise... I like to be comfortable. I don't buy what's trendy... unless it comes in the t-shirt variety... in fact, SHD says I look my best when I'm in a t-shirt and jeans... probably because that's when I'm most comfortable with myself (see me in a suit and you'd think I was a stuffed penguin, well, probably not but at least that's how I feel in them).

So, on my quest to be comfortable... and that I work in a hospital, the gals are trying to talk me into investing in CROCS. My first reaction is, EWWW... but are they comfortable?

Would I sacrifice the EWWW factor for comfort?

What do you think? Give it to me.

They even come in pink!

Who Wants a Gay Elvis Teddy Bear Anyway?

When you have pets… or dogs that inhibit you from purchasing the bedding of your choosing (of course I wouldn’t be speaking from personal experience about a Beagle who "kills" anything with stuffing - as that would make me appear to be bitter)... you realize that they must be monitored AT ALL TIMES. Or carnage ensues…

I feel no sympathy for the people in the teddy bear museum… I mean, what dog wouldn’t jump at the chance to eat a stuffin’.

And… why would anyone need a teddy bear collection watched by guards and dogs?

I was raised in Independence...

I was raised in Independence and lived there my 27 years until just last November I moved to Kansas City with SHD. I think Independence is a pretty OK place to live. I know that we were the Meth Capitol of the United States back in 1996 and I realize that if you drive down Truman Road or 24 Highway you might think Independence is a little seedy... but I think every city is going to have some rough areas.

I was pretty shocked to hear about the snuff killing that happened a few months back. I'd love to be naive and think that those things only happen in "other" places. I just ran across this AD on Craig's List.

I know a lot of people who know nothing about Craig's List in Kansas City... and these people don't really remind me of people who would be computer savy...

I'm sure they are good people... I mean, they were only teasing when they raped, tortured and killed that woman... in front of a video camera. It was all the press, showing them in a bad light, right?

I think they need a little more than spiritual advising... they pretty much have a reserved seat in hell.